Playing the Part - Chapter 3

 Playing the Part

Chapter 3

Diana continues to learn ever more about herself. Once again she learns that, when it comes to being Diana, Ms. Cambrai is right. Ms. Cambrai is always right. In particular, Ms. Cambrai is right about things which Diana had never even imagined herself doing. Things which make her previous life seem ever more distant as being Diana feels oh-so-very, very good...

Day 430:

Great news!  They not only found a new manufacturer for the clothing line here in the US but this new company can get in operation a whole month faster!  Yay us!  Good thing I didn’t wait any longer than I did for me surgeries!  Mr. Simms is such a smart man!  He’s made such good decisions for me.

Day 433:

I was so bubbly about the news of the production starting sooner that Ms. Cambrai said we should go out and celebrate together.  This being “together” with her, me and Jayden.  We’ve gotten back to doing dance lessons together now that I’ve healed up. I’m still stretching a bit. So it’s been super helpful for me.  And Jayden has been such a sweetheart about it.  His moves with me dancing are just as powerful as ever and I’ve come to relish the way he handles me on the dance floor.  Ms. Cambrai seems to relish his effects on me and teases me about how I was letting Jayden steal me away from her.  Not a chance!

He never could achieve such a feat.  I have to admit though that I’ve been increasingly coming to wonder what it would be like to be made love to by a man.  I don’t think I’m ready to be so animalistically taken by a man as Ms. Cambrai took me the other day.  But even then, I’m having an increasingly difficult time saying no to the idea.

At times I think I should be more bothered by this than I am.  Before all this started I was confidently 100% heterosexual.  Men had no sexual interest to me at all.  And I’d also always been the one in charge with the women I’d dated.  No doubts about that either.

Yet, here I am, just over a year into this character I’m being paid to play for this ad campaign and I’ve almost completely lost any idea of where I am now, sexually.  I now have no desire – no desire at all, honestly, to be in charge in my relationship with Ms. Cambrai.  I find myself not just able to defer to the decisions the men around me make but am eager to defer to them.  To see them smile when I agree with them just makes me feel so happy inside and so worthwhile.  I never used to feel that way when another man smiled at me.  Or when I agreed with him.  But pleasing the men in my life now seems a paramount thing to me.  Am I losing myself in this character I’m portraying?  Has the part I’m playing become who I actually am? And why am I so unable to resist any of it?  Why does submitting to it more and more just seem to make me happier with each submission?  Am I that out of control of myself?  Or am I finally finding peace and serenity in letting others take that control for me?

I’ve asked Dr. Williams about this.  He’s assured me that it’s just been a stressful time for me and that it just shows how dedicated I am to my acting that I would so immerse myself in this character.  I’m finding that answer to not be as reassuring as it once was.  Not when I examine myself in the mirror each morning.  It’s a beautiful woman looking back at me.  A woman I love seeing.  So much so that I can’t even see there ever having been a man who would have been looking back at me in the mirror.  And I don’t even feel any loss about that. 

But at the same time I’ve no desire to become a woman, fully.  I’ve not had my penis out of its chastity tube for almost a year now.  Not aside from keeping my little soldier nicely clean and softly lotioned.  I used to love – I used to need – to jerk myself off – “to pleasure myself” - at least once a day when I wasn’t dating a girl.  Now, with Natalie, I don’t ever even think to make love to her with my penis at all.  And I don’t find that wrong.  Instead, I just feel reassured by it.  Oddly.  Comforted by it.  That, by not ever trying to use my maleness to please her, that I’m free to be the “almost a girl” for her.  That’s what pleases her the most.  And I don’t want that to ever end.

Day 440:

Ms. Cambrai was right!  Oh my god!  She was so right!  Oh yes!

Day 441:

The first samples came in from the new production company!  They’re just but slightly different!  The fitting session was but a quick thing.  We did that in the morning and by mid-afternoon Paul and I were doing our first official shoot!  Finally!  Yes!!!  What a week it’s been!  What wonderful week!

Day 445:

God, I am such a lucky gurl – or girl – or whatever!  New outfits are coming in each day now!  A quick fitting of them and a photo shoot in the afternoon.  Four days in a row now!  I am beyond ecstatic!  Paul is too!  Finally!

Day 446:

No new outfits today but Mr. Simms has said that Paul has to practice dancing with me now.  Oh yes!  He’s surprisingly good.  Not as good as Jayden is with me but, quite good.  A lot better than I was to start with.  And Ms. Cambrai is teaching him quite well and quickly.  It’s been funny to hear him complaining about her using that “pointer” of her on him!  I am oh-so-very-sympathetic about it!  Hah!  Not! :):):)

Day 447:

Another morning’s fitting.  A mid-day dance lesson.  And then some shooting in the afternoon.  Paul said he was so sore from the dancing.  I asked him if he wanted me to give him a massage to work out the kinks in his muscles.  He laughed but said no.  Hesitantly, I think.  I hope so, anyway.  He’s so handsome a man.  A leading lady like me would be lucky to have him as her off screen man too!

Day 448:

The pace isn’t letting up!  I love it!

Day 460:

Finally, a day off!  What a rush it’s been!  The dresses and outfits have been so dreamy!  And everyone says I look divine in them all!  I’m glowing with joy every day. Mr. Simms just loves how radiant I’ve been since the dresses started coming in.  Well, it wasn’t just the dresses, though that’s really helped.  Helped lots, in fact.

Back three weeks ago?  Yes, that’s what really helped.  That’s what “popped the cork” as it was.  Well, there was a cork that got popped but that was just the champagne.  It was the cherry that got popped which made all the difference.

Ms. Cambrai and Jayden and I went out on another dinner date together.  It was sublime.  We were both in matching outfits.  Well, matching in style but contrasting in color.  It was these wonderful sheath numbers that left just the right amount to the imagination – but no more than that!  Hers was a beautiful crimson and mine was a snowy white.  “Virginal white” as she told me when she handed me the dress.  No, it’s not part of the line.  She’d gotten my measurements from Mr. Simms and had a seamstress friend of hers work it up for me and one for her.

Oh, it is such a beautiful dress.  Hers looks awesome on her figure.  And mine awesome on my figure too.  I had to do my makeup a little heavier than usual to keep the whiteness of the dress from leaving me looking washed out by it.  That, however, just made me all the more sultry.  Jayden was positively dashing in his tuxedo that night.  He was beaming with such a gorgeous girls on each arm.  And why not?  We were dynamite and he was the fuse!  Silly, I know but I certainly felt like I was dynamite that night.  And both Jayden and Natalie were doing everything they could to light that fuse until I was sure to explode.  God, that sounds so corny.  But it was true!

We were in such a wonderful mood.  I’d been to Dr. Williams the day before and we apparently went even deeper than ever with the hypnosis session.  I’m still not sure what we worked through that day but I it felt like some huge weight was off my shoulders and I was bubbling about it.

Natalie’s surprising me with that outfit was beyond sweet of her.  I had so many outfits from the production company already but this was special.  This was personal.  It was also hers.  She had it made for me.  Much like she had made me for her.  That wasn’t lost on me that night.  Not lost on me at all.

The dinner was followed by some dancing at the club.  That was sublime.  I finally had a chance to strut my stuff with her and with Jayden!  We owned the dance floor!  The way Ms. Cambrai moved me around in dance after dance must’ve been pure agony for all the men watching.  Two rockin’ hot babes dancing so sensuously together?  Yeah, every straight man’s dream and we had the rapt attention of no few guys as a result.  It certainly didn’t do them any good with their wives or girlfriends!  We both knew we were stoking fires in them that they never be able to touch with us.  That didn’t matter, we were dancing for each other!

And then Jayden took the floor with us.  Our time in the studio was nothing compared to this.  The charge of being in public with him leading me through one dance after another!  Oh…. It was wonderful.  I was floating even as I was working up a wonderful sweat from it all.  I know the women watching were working up a sweat of their own!  Oh, to be in the hands of such a strong and capable man leading his girl around like that!  Yum!  Too bad girls!  This one’s taken!

I thought it was a glorious and wonderful night when we finally made our way back to Ms. Cambrai’s house.  I’d thought that we’d bid Jayden good night and then I’d spend another night wrapped in Natalie’s arms.  I was wrong.  I was so wonderfully wrong!

Instead, we relaxed together, enjoying some tasty Malbec that he’d brought over earlier.  I was delightfully happy from the dancing earlier and was very happily relaxed sitting there on Ms. Cambrai’s couch.  Then she sat herself to one side of me.  Before I could react, Jayden sat himself on the other side of me.  They were both sitting pressed into me.  It felt wonderful but what they did next was even better.

They were both talking so wonderfully to each other and to me and were soon caressing me so softly.  I was being kept off balance by them both.  Natalie would start purring at me and I’d look over to her as she melted me with her smiles.  As I melted, Jayden would start purring into ear and letting his breath flow so erotically across my throat.  I’d turn to him to try and tell what he’d been saying only to have Natalie begin nibbling on my ear and running her fingers along my throat.  They were deliberately working me up into a frenzy like that.

Then Natalie leaned forward and met Jayden’s lips right in front of my face.  As the two were kissing each other deeply, she had her hand atop my trapped little soldier and was pressing it so wonderfully.  Her hand batted my legs apart to keep me from crossing them.  It was beyond hot watching her kiss him.

Then they broke that kiss and turned to me.  She had my lips first.  I could taste the difference.  I could taste him on her tongue.  She let that effect roll through me and then broke away.  I’d barely the chance to take a breath before Jayden’s lips were upon me.  His full, strong lips.  A man’s lips.  Kissing me.  Deeply kissing me.  Not any quick peck or doing so as a joke.  Nor even an actor’s kissing.  No, he was kissing me with the full passion he’d just been kissing my lover with.  I melted to it.  Natalie was breathing softly onto my exposed throat and into my ear. 

“That’s it my love.  That’s my girl.  Kiss him.  Kiss him like you kiss me.  Feel his tongue with yours.  Feel it like you feel mine.  That’s my girl.  That’s my girl!  Yes…. Good girl!”

He broke off that kiss and Natalie was soon taking his place.  Not as long, though.  Deeply enough however.  She smilingly pulled away.

“Yes, I can taste him on you.  I can taste him in you.” She said with a wonderful gleam in her eyes.

While she was devouring me with those eyes, Jayden had found the zipper at the back of my dress.  Natalie took my head in her hands and pulled me to her lips.  As her tongue delved deep into my willing mouth, I felt Jayden pull the zipper down on my dress.  The sensation of the air on my suddenly exposed flesh sent a shiver through me.  Jayden then began peeling the dress off my shoulders and then down off of my breasts.  My nipples were wonderfully sensitive and wonderfully erect.  Something he didn’t fail to notice as he dragged the fabric of the dress across them so slowly.

Natalie broke her kiss to stand me up with her.  Once on my feet, Jayden pulled the dress down further.  Natalie then again broke her kiss, smiled, and pushed me back down into the couch.  Jayden was on me in a flash.  His tongue was dueling with mine through my lips.  It was a duel I was only too eager to lose!

As he was kissing me so passionately, Natalie had worked the dress off of my hips and then pulled it away entirely.  I was left with just my white satin shelf bra, my white Cuban heeled seamed nylons, their ten strap white garters and belt, and my white satin panties over them.  I didn’t feel naked at that moment at all.  Instead, I felt like a gift wrapped present they were enjoying unwrapping as they wished.

The two then began feasting on my exposed flesh and did so in such wonderful ways.  Natalie would be kissing me while Jayden was rolling one of my nipples between his teeth and tongue.  Or Jayden would be kissing me while Natalie was rolling both my nipples between her fingers.  If I ever had any doubts about it being good to have my own real breasts they were permanently banished that night!

These two powerful beings, Natalie and Jayden, were devouring me between them.  It was sublime.  It was heady.  It was wonderful.  I was whimpering with pleasure and moaning with ecstasy.  And they weren’t stopping.

Jayden leaned back and hauled me over and astride him.  He began to worship my breasts the same way Natalie would.  I was writhing atop him and clearly felt his hardness under his pants as I ground myself down upon it.  I was giving Jayden a lap dance!  Giving him a lap dance just as Ms. Cambrai had taught me to give her!  As Jayden was distracting me so wonderfully, Natalie had worked herself out of her dress.  Her crimson lingerie was a match of my white ensemble.  The contrast was beautiful.

She stood behind me and snaked her hands around to cup my breasts, once again working her magic fingers on my nipples.  Jayden took my face in his hands and began kissing me deeply again.  Pressing his outstretched tongue past my lips and as deeply into my mouth as he could.  It was as if he was fucking my mouth with his tongue.  So wicked!  I could only moan around it and writhe myself on his cock, trapped as it was still.

That didn’t last. 

Natalie pulled me off Jayden and pressed me into the couch.  She brought a knee up between my thighs and ground it into me there.  The pressure was wonderfully erotic.  She was bearing down on me and working my nipples still.  Her kisses were all over my throat.  I was dragging my nails across her back so sensually.  Her moans were a gift to me and I was matching them with my own.

Natalie stood herself upright while still kissing me and wonderfully holding on to my nipples.  She backed away from my lips and gazed down upon me.  I could see Jayden behind her and watched her lust filled eyes flutter as his cock pushed into her.  As he filled her she fell slowly forward to once again be kissing me deeply.  Her fingers were working my nipples wonderfully. I reached up with my own fingers to find and work her nipples.  Her whimpers of pleasure were my reward.  She stayed like that for but a while and then shifted yet again.

Jayden sat himself down on the couch again.  Then both he and Natalie shifted me so that my face was but inches away from his throbbing cock.  A cock still glistening with her juices.

He stroked my cheek with one hand and gently guided me to him.  I was so inflamed that I could but part my lips and sink myself onto him.

Natalie was at my side kissing me and caressing my breasts and my nipples with one hand while the other ran across my pantie covered rear.  Her touch was wonderful, as always.

His cock felt so satiny and smooth and firm and warm in my mouth.  Entirely unlike Natalie’s strap-ons or toys.  Even when, to keep them from feeling “cold” she’d heat them in warm water or first push them up inside her before pushing them inside me.  It helped but it wasn’t the same.

“That’s it my girl.  That’s it.  Feel that cock inside your mouth.  Taste it.  Savor it.  You feel how hot that is?  You feel him throb on your tongue?  Yes, you do.  You feel that.  Good girl. Good girl. You’re doing that, my love.  You’re making him throb.  Yes, you are.  Those beautiful lips of yours are making him pulse.  That sweet tongue of yours is making him hard.  Can you taste that baby?  That’s precum honey.  That’s a man’s nectar.  And you’re coaxing it out of him like the good girl you are!”  Her voice was drenched with lust.

I’d barely gotten half of his shaft past my lips when she pulled me off of him.  Jayden was running his fingers through my hair and touching me so gently.

Natalie quickly pulled my lips to hers and drove her tongue into me.  She swirled herself around inside my mouth and pulled away with a growl.

“Yes, that’s him on your lips baby.  You’ve a man’s cock taste on your tongue and filling your mouth.  Good girl.  Isn’t wonderful!”

Then she turned and set herself upon Jayden’s cock. I watched, fascinated, as she quickly brought him entirely inside her.  Only when her face was pressing down around the base of his shaft did she stop her swallowing of him.  It was mouth watering to see.  She popped herself off and then pulled me onto him again.  Not like when she’d pulled me on to her strap-on cock.  But firmly and controllingly none-the-less.  She guided me well but I only reached but two thirds of the way down his beautifully thick shaft before my throat caught up with me.  She eased off the pressure and allowed me to come free of his shaft once more.  As I was catching my breath and trying to control my gagging, Jayden was gently stroking my face.  And Natalie was once again throating his entire length.  We tried once more and I got no further.

Rather than be disappointed, Jayden took me up in his arms began kissing me so deeply he was making my head spin.  I don’t know how long that lasted but soon he was helping me stand up and the two them propelled me into Natalie’s bedroom.  Soon I was on my hands and knees with Natalie behind me.  I guessed what she was up to as whenever she’s had me on my hands and knees on her bed she’s soon driving one of her strap-ons deep past my rosebud.  I wasn’t wrong.  As Jayden stood in front of me, just off the bed, he began gently kissing me and savored my reactions as Natalie pushed herself into me.  The heat of it all was leaving me panting.  Once she was buried to the hilt, she stopped.  She let me catch up a bit and slowly started rocking herself in me.  She knew, from doing this time and again, that in that position and with that particular strap-on, she could drive me from one climax to the next.  She had complete control of that and of me when she had me there.  She could coax out my spurting by just picking up the pace of her fucking me.  Or draw it out so wonderfully by keeping that grinding so maddeningly slow.

That was Jayden’s cue.  He took his lips away from mine and stood up.  I eagerly opened my mouth for him and soon had his shaft once more pushing across my tongue.  He took his time.  He stroked my hair as he would slowly push in until he felt me tense and then pull back until he felt me relax again.  The man truly knew how to open a throat to his cock.  The rhythm we soon set was wonderful.  The pleasure Natalie was driving in to me with her “cock” was brilliant and it was all I could do to not buck back into her so as to drive myself over and cum from it.  But I wanted to please Jayden at that moment.  I wanted to please this man more than anything at that moment.  His cock filling my mouth became my world.  And it was a wonderfully delicious and powerful world.

I let myself go to the sensations filling me.  To the cocks filling me.  I basked in the bliss of it.  And reveled in what I was becoming for them both.  So much so that it took me a while to realize they’d both stopped.  Natalie, my wonderful Ms. Cambrai, was no longer rocking her strap-on into my rear. And Jayden was no longer pressing his cock ever deeper into my mouth and throat.

I realized they stopped because he could go no further.  He was fully in my mouth and throat.  Fully in me.  He gently pulled back and I breathed deeply.  Then he pushed in again and slowly pulled back.  The fullness felt wonderful.  Like nothing I’d ever felt before.  The heat of it.  The smoothness of his cock’s flesh upon my lips and tongue.  It was wonderful.

Sensing how I’d surrendered my throat to his rule, Jayden slowly picked up the pace once more.  Natalie leaned forward to watch more closely and began sensuously talking to me again.  Her seductive words turning me on even more.

“Oh baby, look at that cock!  Oh yes!  Feel how he fills you with it!  All the way in!  Yes!!!  That’s my girl.  That’s my beautiful girl!  Pleasing your man!  Just like a pretty, pretty girl should do!  That’s it my love!  That’s it.  Open yourself to him.  Open your throat to him.  Feel him fill you up.  Feel him possess you with that cock!  Yes, girl. Yes…. Work your throat around that cock.  Make your man happy.  Please your man!  That’s it girl.  You love pleasing your man.  You love pleasing me.  You are pleasing him with that cock!  Good girl!  Good girl!  I’m so proud of you!  You are such a special girl!”

Her words were so powerful and so erotic and such a turn on.  And she started rocking her cock into me now, matching Jayden’s thrusts into my throat.  From the way he was thrusting, I guessed he was getting close and that thrilled me!  I was going to make this man cum!  I was going to bring him to climax with just my lips and tongue and throat!  Me!  Diana!  I was going to please this man in so deep a way!

Finally, Jayden could take no more and I felt his balls begin pulling up as his cum began pulsing through his shaft and into me.  His hands were like a vice holding my head steady.  I kept my tongue working on his shaft as I felt his cock pulse in my mouth and then he pulled back out of my throat so that his cum could spray upon my tongue and I could taste what it was like to have a man cum in my mouth.

As Jayden was filling my mouth with himself, Natalie had picked up that pace of filling me from the other end.  The timing wasn’t perfect but the combination was beyond joyous.  I howled my ecstasy around his cock as my own climax exploded within me.  I felt Natalie’s fingers dig into my hips and I could tell that she too was in bliss.  The rubbing of the strap-on against her clit combined with the power of what she and Jayden had just fulfilled in me had sent her over as well.

She eventually released her grip on my hips and fell back upon herself – slowly pulling her wonderful strap-on cock from within me.  I regretted the emptiness immediately.  Jayden, who’d been bracing himself upright amidst his bliss by clamping his hands upon my head, eased that grip as well and then pulled me upright.  His lips were upon mine in a flash and his tongue was deep in my mouth a second later.  His arms tight around me as I kissed him back as deeply as I could.  My breasts mashed against his chest.  His kiss, with my mouth full of his cum, was as unexpected as it was wonderful.  I floated in his embrace and his devouring kiss.

Eventually, we all came down from that bliss and lay cuddled together in Natalie’s bed.  I was wonderfully high from the encounter.  I’d not only just had a man’s cock in my mouth but I’d made him cum from it!    The thought that I was able to please a man that way was amazing!  I felt so… satisfied and happy that I could please a man that way.

I was in a very happy space.  That sort of glow that comes from a fun and deeply satisfying intimate encounter.  And it was very much helped along by having Natalie and Jayden still “trapping” me between them.  They felt so….good as they held me and stroked me and were just everything I’d come to relish in such truly considerate lovers.  I was wondering whether I was going to have to come down from that happy place and head back to Paul’s or whether Jayden would be departing or perhaps one of us would wind up in Natalie’s guest bedroom or whatever.  I did not expect what started next.

We three did lay there for some wonderfully floaty time.  But that turned out to only be until Jayden was ready to go again!  Both Natalie and Jayden started kissing and fondling me more intently as I lay there between them so happily.  I didn’t mind at all when Natalie pulled my panties off entirely.  I didn’t see much need for it as the thong panties hadn’t gotten in her way earlier.  But they were kinda sticky from when I spurted.  And it always feels good when she touches me down there.  Besides, Jayden was once again kissing me so wonderfully and also was delightfully playing with my nipples again.

A little while later I felt her touching me again down there and then I heard the unmistakable “click” sound of her snapping open the little padlock that held the tube around my little soldier in place.  My eyes opened wide at that!  She’s only ever removed that tube when it was time for my weekly cleaning.  And we’d already done that this week!  Jayden kissed me harder and kept me pressed into the mattress with his hands as his fingers continued working my nipples.  I was writhing in pleasure and in surprise!

Especially when I felt Natalie’s tongue on me down there.  Oh god!  She’d never done that in all the time I’d known her!  I so often wished she would have.  But she said I had to learn what it meant to play the part of a lady and it was her role to teach me that.  And “an elegant lady does not get her cock sucked. Instead, an elegant lady sucks cock!”  Those Mantras were still in my happy little girly brain even at that moment!  Her lips on my little member felt heavenly.  It took me a few seconds to realize she wasn’t actually “sucking my cock” but was, instead, licking along my length.  That she was treating it as something of an overgrown clit.  Still it was wonderful!  And it was so perverse!  The sensations were amazing.  It had been a year – no, well over a year – since anyone had last touched me like that down there.  And here was this woman I loved licking it so sweetly just as she’d taught me to lick her so sweetly.  I was in heaven!  In heaven particularly I was being so deeply kissed by such powerful man at the same time!

Natalie took hold of one of my hands and brought it to Jayden’s cock.  His rapidly hardening cock!  I moaned around his tongue in my mouth.  Oh, yes!  That cock felt soo…good!

Natalie paused from lapping at me and began purring in that wonderful lust filled way of hers.

“Mmm…. That’s right, girl.  That’s right.  That’s a man’s cock there.  And you, my pretty girl are making it hard!  Yes… Yes… stroke his cock.  You feel that?  You’re doing that, baby!  You’re making him hard.  You’re making him hard for you.  You want that cock, don’t you baby!  Yes, you do!”

Her voice, his kissing, her delicately playing her finger tips along my sweet little cock, his rolling my nipples in his fingers, and the feel of his swelling cock in my hand all had their effect.

“Yes!!!  I do!  I want your cock again Jayden!  Please let me suck it!  Please!” I whimpered in lust.

She laughed.  He smiled and kissed me some more.

At that, I felt her grab hold of my legs and suddenly push them skyward as Jayden pinned me further into the bed with his kisses and mauling of my breasts.  She’d nearly bent me double before I felt the pillow being stuffed under the small of my back.  I moaned.  I was too in the moment and far too turned on to even think of saying no.  I wanted Jayden.  I wanted him inside me so badly it ached.  Any fear I had of what that might mean was completely brushed aside by the overwhelming lust I had at that moment.  I could barely stand to let his cock go from my hand as he began shifting around me.

Soon enough I was looking up at a vision which still is razor sharp in its clarity even now.  Jayden, his high cheekbones, his toned body, his grip on my ankles, the warmth in his face, and the hunger in his eyes.  All with my white nyloned legs framing his torso as he brought his cock to my rosebud.  I was panting with lust and babbling how much I wanted him.

Natalie shushed me with a kiss and then moved back out of my vision so that I could watch as Jayden took me.  Took me as a man takes a woman for, at that moment I felt I truly was one.  I don’t think there was anything left of me that was still male.  At least not in my mind.  And what there was of my male body was so much smaller and softer now as well.  Softer like a woman.  I was aching for all of this.  Natalie’s breathing her sex talk into my ear only added to it.

Jayden moved himself forward some more and gazed down at me with that warm smile and hungry gleam in his eyes.  His grip on my ankles tightened as I felt Natalie shift and heard her putting some lube onto his cock.  He licked his lips and pushed forward with his hips, never taking his eyes off of mine.  Natalie guided his cock to my rosebud and I whimpered more as I felt its pressure.

“Do you want me?” Jayden asked, simply.  “Do you want me inside you?”

“Yes!!!!  Please!” I moaned back at him.

“You are such a pretty gurl, Diana.  So very beautiful.  I want you.  I want to fill you.  I want to feel you around my cock.  I want to fill you again with my cum.  I want to make love to you.  I want to make love to you with my cock until you climax for me.  Do you want that?  Do you want me to take you that way?”

I could feel the head of his cock just barely pressing in to my rosebud.  The lube on him and me was making it so slippery.  I felt the pressure there but he was holding himself still and his grip on me was holding me still as well.

He wanted to make it clear and wanted me to make the choice.  He wanted me to ask him for his cock.  No mistakes, no excuses.  We both knew what it would mean once he was inside of me there and it would be a forever thing for me.  I had to choose to surrender myself to him.  I had to choose to submit to him and submit to his cock.  I wouldn’t ever be able to say I was a heterosexual anything ever again after that.  Taking him in my mouth had been a step that way but this… this was something else entirely.

I was near weeping with lust and need for him.  I did want him.  I did want to submit to him.  I needed to submit to him.  I couldn’t be Diana without submitting to him.  I couldn’t be Diana without surrendering to his cock and wrapping myself around it.  Somehow, I found my voice.  He wasn’t going to let me make that surrender with something as deniable as a nod of my head or a look in my eyes.  No, he wanted to hear me ask to become his girl.  The intensity of that was exhilarating.  And I did.  I asked him to take me.  I asked him that.

“Please, Jayden.  Yes!  I do!  I want you to fill me with your cock!  I want to feel you inside me!  I want your cum inside me.  I want you!  Please Jayden, I need this!” I pleaded with him.

Natalie was lightly caressing my shaft, never stroking, just playing along its length and swollen state.  The sensations were electric.  So was also caressing my breasts and my nipples.  I sensed her eyes watching me as she felt Jayden begin to push himself into me.  All I could see was this beautiful powerful man finally giving me the one experience I had yet to have.  The experience we all knew that Diana could not be complete without having.  That of a man making love to her.

I felt Jayden’s wonderful cock push open my rosebud.  He was moving oh-so-slowly and tenderly.  He was savoring this.  No matter what ever happened after this, Jayden would forever be Diana’s first man.  He would forever by my first man.  I reached up and ran my hands along the muscles of his forearms as he pushed further into me.  My ring popped around his glans and he kept pushing.  He stopped and let me breathe.  He pushed and then let me adjust.  The fullness wasn’t new to me.  The size wasn’t new to me. 

Ms. Cambrai had taught me months prior what it meant to have my rosebud spread and my insides filled.  She’d taught me again and again and again.  I’d come to love it, as she intended.  And with my little soldier always locked away until tonight, I could climax in no other way except for with a vibrator against my penis or being filled down there.  And Ms. Cambrai was intent on training me to that.  Teaching me to that.  Over the months she had moved from toys of increasing girth and length to strap-ons of ever thicker girth and ever longer length.  Once she had me so conditioned to being taken that way that I was beseeching her to take me again and again that way.  She would tease me that as good as her toys and her strap-ons were they could never substitute for an actual cock.  Never.  I didn’t argue with her.  I wouldn’t have dared.  Not when she had such absolute control over my climaxes and so precisely regulated how – if at all – I could ever find relief from the lust filled fires she kept burning in me.  I also didn’t argue as it made no difference to me.  Not then.  I’d no interest in another man’s cock.  I was a straight male.

Yes, a straight male with beautiful breasts glued to my chest and living as a woman to better play the part of a woman.  Then I became a straight male with actual breasts on my chest but still living as a woman and still learning to please a woman as a woman would.  Still, cocks had no interest to me.  Not then.

But this was now, not then.  And Jayden’s cock was now my entire world.

And Natalie was right.  Ms. Cambrai was right.  A real cock feels so, so much better than anything else.  The heat of it inside me was amazing.  The sensations of his shaft sliding across my lower lips was wondrous.  And the way his shaft nosed in to me and followed the curves of my insides was different too.  Everything was different.  And so, so much better.

Finally, he stopped.  As earlier that night, he stopped as he’d no further to go.  As difficult as I’d found his wonderful length to take into me with my mouth, my rear simply enveloped him whole.  All with his lust filled smile and hungry gleam in his eyes fixing me in place underneath him.  I moaned with pure lust and spread my white clad legs wide.  He let go of my ankles and leaned over me fully.  His heat upon my body was inflaming.  He placed his arms on either side of my shoulders and leaned down to kiss me.  To tenderly kiss me.  At the same time he began rocking his cock in and out of me.  His lips and his cock and his tongue and his scent were driving me wild.

“Yes, oh yes… You are so beautiful Diana.  So beautiful.  I wanted you the moment I first saw you.  I needed you when I first saw you.  I had to have you from when I first saw you.  Yes…. I’ve wanted this moment for months now…. Yes….” He growled at me between his kissing me.  His tongue driving into my mouth like his cock was driving into me below.

My head was spinning.  The pleasure from his cock inside me was immense.  The feel of it spreading me, filling me, fulfilling me.  The heat of it.  And the way it was pushing over my “girly G-spot” was sublime.  But his words… oh… his words….

He said he wanted me.  He wanted Diana.  He wanted me.  I was Diana.  Diana was me.  Now, more than ever, Diana was me.  He saw this beautiful, elegant, graceful vision of femininity and had to have her.  He had to have me.  I was that feminine vision.  I am that feminine vision.  He had to have Diana and now he is!  He is having me!  I am pleasing him.  I’m pleasing him because I am Diana!  Diana is who I am and it pleases him!   Yesssss!!!!  It was like and epiphany for me.  Something clicked so deeply within me at that moment.  I was Diana now!  Completely her!

He pulled himself back to see fully how my mind was reeling and my body was reacting to the joy his shaft inside me was creating.  He was watching with those hungry eyes of his as his girl’s climax built and exploded from his taking her.  Taking her with his cock and filling her with his cock.  It was beautiful.  It was sweet.  I was glorious!  And my climaxing from submitting to him drove him over as well.  I cried out in pleasure as I began to explode.

He pressed his weight down on to me and drove his tongue into my mouth, his lips embracing mine.  His hands found my nipples and rolled them between his fingers so wonderfully.  I howled into him my pleasure as he drove me further into the bliss. He was hammering his cock into me then until I felt him shudder.  Then I felt his cock begin to throb.  Throb inside me.  For the very first time ever I had a man’s cock cumming inside me.  The very first time a man had taken me and sated himself in me.  I was now truly Diana.  Truly and deeply and forever her.  His pulsing shaft made that permanent with each jet of his seed scalding my insides.  I wrapped my hands around his firm ass cheeks and felt his muscles there flex with each of his driving thrusts.  As I climaxed I curled my fingertips into his beautiful ass, my nails digging into his flesh.  He growled lustily at the sensation.

I was crying.  Joyfully crying.  This was such a powerful moment.  It was so wonderfully intense.  Even now, writing it all into this journal it is still of picture perfect clarity in its vividness.  Jayden was and will always be the first man to have taken me.  Jayden and his wonderful cock made Diana the full and beautiful feminine being she is today.  It was wonderful.

Eventually, I noticed that Natalie was still right beside us.  My connection with Jayden was so intense that he was all I could see and his cock was all I could feel.  Bliss.  It was bliss.

Jayden kissed me again, deeply, and then moved himself to rest more on his side thus taking his weight off of me.  I missed that feeling but appreciated being able to breathe freely again.  His cock was still deeply buried in my insides.  As I started coming back to Earth from what I’d just experienced I realized that Natalie had snuggled up to my other side and had pressed her voluptuously soft and wonderful skin to mine.  She scooped up some of the cream I’d spurted from my climax and savored it with her tongue.  The gleam in her eyes was of a wicked contentment.

Even in my happily dazed and blissful state I realized that this moment was the culmination of over a year’s worth of effort and work and teaching and guidance on her part.  She’d told me from our first “Deportment Lesson” that her intent was to teach me everything it took to make me into the elegant lady I needed to be.  The lessons progressed from the basics of how to move my body to moving my feet to my carriage to my mindset and, eventually to how an elegant lady would express her lust.  And now, at last she had taught me how an elegant lady would please her man.  She, more than anyone, had helped bring Diana into reality and let her become real.  I could never repay the debt for such a creation.  I could only hope Diana was worthy of her teachings.  She saw this in my face and began kissing my tears away.